Oh yeah...everyone needs a little Yellow Laa-Laa in their life sometimes. Jed's first word was "wellow" which went right to "wellow waa waa".


Ok, back to reality..oh no wait, that's not where I live...anyway....I worked at the salon today with the lovely Alecia Pandolfi. Ok so I didn't really work, I curled. Today was homecoming for 4 schools in the area and she was pretty busy. I did the curling, she did the magic! AP is extremely good at what she does. Really no one better. Thanks for the distraction, fun, and usefulness (or at least the illusion of). It was great. Savannah stopped in for a bit and then she headed out...up to Happy Valley. THON 5k is tomorrow. Nana, Pappaw, Mindy and Savannah always are Jed's escorts for this event...every year Pappaw runs. This will be their 1st time without him. Super hard...and heartbreaking. After I finished at Alecia's and Savannah headed for PSU I came home and got a glimpse of what my life will be like next year. Danny was out riding and no one was here...just me with nothing to do. Well I mean I could have cleaned or studied or something industrious...but that's not me. I took a 20 min nap and went out to do one of the only things that makes me feel ok when I am alone...shopped. I know, I know not a pass time an unemployed person needs to indulge in but I needed a fall bag...really. I have an awesome big GUESS bag I used last year but it is still packed with things from life with Jed...bags of meds, queasy pops, band aids..gum..just full of what my life WAS and I cannot bring myself to go through it or even just empty it. So that's the reason for a new bag. I went to TJ Maxx, I tried to be reasonable. (I thought of you Trish). I did not order the $500 bag that I have been drooling over online. I spent 79.00 on a $160.00 bag. I like it..I think. It is not my usual big "statement" bag...more neutral. OMG I just realized I typed and ENTIRE paragraph about my bag....so very pathetic. Ok, I got boots too.
Danny came home while I was out "self-medicating". I picked him up and we went out to dinner. Now I have a great pasta dinner for Monday night after school. They give you so much freakin' food!

The small glimpse I had of my future life was disconcerting. It's not the right time for this...I was supposed to have many more years of mommy-hood. I was supposed to have FUN teenage boy stuff to do. I have been robbed and I am a bit pissed off about it. (more than a bit). I do not like being forced into this. Change is not a real issue for me but when it is against my will....that makes me very unhappy. but what am I going to do....shit..I hate it.

My Peeps...... what a chuckle...




Missing you Jeddie Spaghetti... more than words. I know you are hanging at PSU this weekend. Tomorrow will be a hard day, help them through. Oh, Jed...this sucks and it is SO VERY HARD. Living without you, there are just no words for how wrong it all is. I hope you are playing hard, riding your bike, snow boarding and playing the sax, drums and guitar. All the things you said you wanted to do. I hope it is sunny and beautiful and the video games are endless. Mommy Loves you
Love J & K