Jed and Forrest....Forrest gets his port out in a couple of weeks!!! YAY Forrest. I know he is nervous about the surgery. Don't worry, Jed will be looking out for you! Forrest could always make Jed smile.
My butterfly, on my butterfly bush :)
So our trip to Hershey Med went off well. It was SOOOO great to see everyone at clinic...except for Holly who was at the beach! I will see you soon chickie, you can't escape me forever! I missed Maritsa too, she was not feeling well. Hope you are feeling better soon. I saw Megan, Trish, Tom, Joanne, Lois, Jenn, Carol and Denise...oh and I got to see Dr. Kahn...I was happy to run into him. He is a very lovely man and a very good doctor. He sat with me in the hallway for almost an hour while they were packing Jed's room and getting him dressed. Seeing Denise is always wonderful. Even now, her voice is so comforting! I have missed her...and everyone so much. She told me she keeps a picture of Jed on her desk.....I cannot tell you how much that means to me. Seeing Carol was wonderful too. She is our infusion room nurse. The one that always had to help me get Jed to pee so we could start chemo! She is just a wonderful person. They all said to say hello to Hop!!! Being in clinic was really like being at home...weird. We then met our fave house keeper and wonderful friend, Denise (a different one), on the bridge and gave her her own special bag of cookies! It was fun, as always, to see her. She used to bring me coffee every night on her way to her night shift job! Missed her. Up on 7 west we saw Kris, and Winnie (Winnie, you look great and I am so glad you are feeling ok), and a few other nurses, Erin, Kristy..oh geeze I know I will forget someone...don't be upset if I do! I did pretty well, kept it all together until I saw the aide that helped Danny pack the room and load the car...I was so grateful to her for helping Danny. Can I think of her name right now??? Of course not..crap. Anyway I kinda lost it when I saw her. I talked to Debbie, Iysis' grandma, while Savannah went into see Jazmine. Jaz is in our room. I swear I knew that even before I left the house this morning. I was not surprised at all when 56 was her room. Weird. It was nice to see everyone and I did better than I thought I would. It never occurred to me that the problem would come when I was leaving. When the doors to 7 West opened and I walked through I felt a slight panic and then when the elevator doors closed it took every ounce of will that I had to not just completely collapse. Leaving the hospital without my son will always be wrong. For so many years, when we would lose kids on the floor, Jed and I would talk about how hard it must be for the parents to leave the hospital for the last time. Never, ever did I think I would be one of those parents. It sucks. That moment was the closest I have come in 7 months to really falling apart. But I didn't. Yay..I guess. I didn't see Janiece or Holly and Amy is now a mommy hanging out doing cool, stay at home mommy things...my fave job in the world. I am hoping to see everyone at the luncheon. I would have to camp out on 7 west for a few days to see all of our nurses...that is not happening..so maybe some of them will come to the luncheon too. All in all it was good. I am glad I went. It is hard to have, literately, my whole life changed so abruptly, I have missed them.
Ok, on to my Gram....in true Buckley fashion she seems to have rallied, they changed her meds and she was talking to my Aunt today...was coherent and much better! Amazing!
My mom just called to tell me that Jed might be hanging out at my brother's. Seems that they are having issues with their light bulbs and Livi's portable DVD player that was laying on the counter and TURNED OFF started to play and was playing Hakuna Matata :) Not only did Jed love that movie it is the name of the house Adam and Tiersa rented for their wedding in St John....Jed's favorite place.
Our trip to and from the hospital was filled with yellow butterflies flying by Savannah's windshield...too many to count!!!!
OH Jeddie, I miss you like you would not believe. I think of how worried you always were about the other kids on the floor. When you heard a baby cry you used to tell me I should go check on them :) No crying babies while we were up there today. There is such a huge hole in my life and in my heart. You were and are bigger than life. There is no way to fill this hole. I just have to learn to live with it being there. UGH...I hate it. I want my friend....my son back. Mommy loves you Jeddie Spaghetti
Love J & K
oh and on the way to the hospital we passed 2 big trucks that said J & K scrap!!! oh my.